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Thursday, May 20, 2010

THE XX ARE CRAP

Right now about the only thing that might possibly be, errrrm, ‘hipper’ than The XX would be if you were somehow able to transform the lower part of your body into Dirty Projectors, your midriff into James Murphy and your top-half into some multi-headed Island of Dr. Moreau-esque representation of Animal Collective, hang yrself upside dn from the Brooklyn Bridge and perform an infinitely recursive hall-of-mirrors act of auto-fellatio that caused you to eventually to disappear up yer own arse in a Nightcrawler-ish pfffft of cultural quantum-foam, leaving only a vague anti-hapton after-echo for some 8yr-old intern at NME.Com to discover sometime in 2026 and declare 2010 to have been a "Golden Age of Alternative Rock" (though in a reductive text-like language that uses special characters rather than vowels).

But - you know what - having actually seen them live, I THOUGHT THEY WERE A BIG POOEY PILE OF INDIE.YAWN.

The XX = The ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Like Dullsville, man. 9.3 on the snoooozometer. Or whatever the opposite of Richter Scale is.

Not surprised they've worked with Diplo 'cos they have a song that sounds like a really crap version of something by Santogold, which probably means they've all heard the same song by The Cure or The Cars. Or something.

*sticks out tongue and catches a small, midge-like fly*

"How's that for Indie/Not Indie?"

Next!!!!

I've always wanted to like Liars more than I do - which is to say: "NOT MUCH" - but I find myself curiously disinterested when I try to listen to them. Just. Not. Feeling. It. Some of my friends rate them. So do I, but not necesarily in a way that the band would like to be rated. While there's no doubting their fiercesome Quirky Quotient, it somehow all feels a bit, y'know, Trying Too Hard.

Live, their 7.8-8.2 showing on The Alt.Rock Annoyance Spectrum was replaced by, well, Sheer Boredom. Man.

Don't like lead vocalist's voice. Especially grates live. Shifted between somewhere North-of-Lee Hazelwood and what sounded like a Late Era Variety tribute to Ian McCulloch. Band lacklustre, mostly, I thought. On stage, the quirkiness translated into charmlessly sludgy Animal Collective Lite-isms and jetlagged NY (heh) "Dance Punk". Lost interest v. quickly.

Stoned students probably dug it a lot. I didn't.

Shame on Mute for signing them.

6 Comments:

At 8:52 pm, Blogger Loki said...

lovin' the bile... there's been waaaay too much love in here...

word verification = terses

and i think that says it all...

 
At 9:16 pm, Blogger farmer glitch said...

Must admit I sat through about 20 minutes of their set on the last night of ATP - think I even left the Raincoats to see a bit (bleedin thick or what) ... nothing much wrong wit them I suppose - just seen it heard it all before - done much better by many others ... yawn -!!

 
At 12:21 am, Blogger Daniel Poeira said...

Kids today, too concerned about clothes, hair, getting the correct brand of instruments... buying that rare pedal from eBay... It's not there anymore, the necessity, the sheer physical pain that forces you to rock. They just do it because they enjoy it. It's like the Medicis decided to paint the Sistine Chapel themselves.

 
At 3:54 pm, Blogger Fritz Bogott said...

We used to piss off the old farts by exaggerating our emotional range.

The new kids piss off us old farts by compressing their emotional range.

Success on that dimension, anyway.

 
At 6:15 am, Blogger jaysondensman said...

Holy SHIT! Your opening paragraph! Crack me the fuck UP!

I must remind myself that I know people who can and WILL tear me a new one if I turn in something bad and smelly. Or even worse, mediocre.

 
At 9:34 am, Blogger I am not Kek-w said...

I'm even harsher on myself, Jay. lol

 

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