Thursday, April 22, 2010

In the small hours last night I suddenly remembered that my, er, (*inwardly cringes*) BFS-nominated story "Cone Zero" features a Numbers Station with a v. sinister twist. I guess I must've summoned that up out of my own childhood radio-listening days.

There's no mystery on DAB, etc. No static , no hiss. It's crap. A thousand different local trebly-sounding radio-stations all playing the same shitty mix of 80's Oldies and Cheryl Cole.

You can still buy it here. "Cone Zero", not DAB.

Apologies for the blatant self-promotion, but if I don't do it, then...well, you know. Got to at least make some pretense at making a living out of this!

Ah, fuck it: back catalogue here in the "books by" section.


At 3:14 pm, Blogger Fritz Bogott said...

Why so coy? If you're so ashamed of lucre, make us pay you in liquor.

At 11:54 pm, Blogger I am not Kek-w said...

Lucre AND liquor, please!!!!

Now, you've touched on a weird issue here, Fritz. It's both true *and* a sweeping generalisation that the English have a strange reluctance sometimes where self-promotion is concerned; it's in part a residue of our Class System: if you come from a Working Class background (like me) we have an odd unnamed fear that we might come to resemble the people we resent and despise. People who've had an expensive education don't suffer from this, natch. Plus: fold this in with a couple layers of my own personal neuroses and, well...

But, you know, if I don't believe in my own work, then why should anyone else, yeah?

So, go and buy it now, you fuckers!

Ahhhh, that's better! Thanks for that Fritz. Made more headway there than 20 years of therapy.

Dang, I feel good.

At 9:30 am, Blogger db said...

This is one of those things that I keep grinding away on, and I still haven't totally figured out a suitable model, but I'm slowly growing more comfortable with the idea that I *make* things that people can *buy* from me, which seems obvious but throws my head for a loop once in a while. It's strange how much reconditioning I've had to do just to be able to put up a website or sell things at a show.

At 2:45 pm, Blogger Fritz Bogott said...

I'm much more on top of my craft in the kitchen than at my desk, so I use a writing~cooking metaphor to explain my public/commercial writing to myself.

I cook every day. Lots of people seem to like my cooking. I'm not shy to offer my cooking to people--even strangers. I would happily sell the best of my cooking at a farmers' market. If a batch of something is going to taste really bad, I don't share it.

When my confidence in sharing or selling my writing lapses, I substitute 'writing' for 'cooking' in the paragraph above and repeat it to myself.

At 7:19 pm, Blogger I am not Kek-w said...

Thanks to you both for talking about this - I've also been carrying on a parallel conversation with Nick Gutta about this topic and our obvious English Discomfort - this is very useful for me to be talking about this stuff - it's helping me weed out the roots of my own reticence.

I like both your metaphors/ways of dealing with this. I'm starting to see a way out of my own nonsensical neuroses!


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