KID SHIRT

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

NOT AVAILABLE







Recorded in '97. Still not available. And, unlike The Residents, it never will be.

THE ASSOCIATION OF MASTER UPHOLSTERERS

I love Guilds, Unions, Affiliations, Secret Societies, etc (who wants to be in mine!?), espesh one that involves soft furnishings:



Formed in 1947 (presumably as a post-war thing, like the NHS, so that the people of Britain would never again have to forgo the pleasure of cushions, comfy chairs, etc), it's...The Association of Master Upholsterers.

Not any ol' Upholsterer, mind you - just The Masters! Secret rites and initiation ceremonies...unspeakably comfortable goings-ons in dark subterranean cellars...candlelight and tassles...

I notice that their name now includes "And Soft Furnishers"...as if there's been some sort of buy-out or amalgamation, or an underworld style take-over (a St. Valentine's day velvet massacre!)...makes you wonder what the background politics were...the dirty deeds and the manoeuvrings; who are the kingpins in this secret world, the shadowy figures pulling the strings behind the scenes?