Monday, June 26, 2006


More refried New Beat zombieporn from V/VM...Heh: New Beat, the genre that fucking refuses to die...or refuses to die fucking. Vee's approach goes b/yond mere token revivalism; instead, he tries to tease dark new shapes and narratives from the genre rather than just stiffly reanimating its corpse for one final vainglorious coke-addled jig.

Available on WeMe...I'm so glad Vee got this out on a Belgian label, 'cause he's finally been able to put that all-important "Made in Belgium" sticker on one of his records.

"...the best orgasm of my young life," says a woman, her voice deadpan and drained of any recognisable emotion, shagged stupid and abandoned inbetween weary, halfhearted 303-isms and skitterish hats. The music sounds wonderfully flacid and limp, partially deflated, as if constant repetition has drained all sense of joy from the sex-act, or from life itself, leaving the listener stranded in some twilight limbo half-life, where we just keep on doing the same things over and over again... consciously or not, V/VM has accurately documented glamour's ultimate end-point: the existential monkeybrain meatpuppet dead-end that is the inevitable result of both perversity and consumerism. NLP teaches us that if you keep doing the same thing, you will get the same result w/ diminishing returns, but this process has never been soundtracked sooo beautifully.

"Destelbergen" is leaden, stolid and pompously Germanic with rattling rimshots and jackbooted drums, and sampled scream-vox that make the hairs on the back of me neck stand to attention. This is fetishistik, fascist & fascinating: the theme-tune to Airstrip One's version of "Big Brother"...the s/t to hair-care commercials slowed dn to 89bpm and spliced w/ subliminal cut-aways to extreme watersports...cctv footage from Snuff Discotecque 93...the real sound of the 21st century mediascape as it unravels in real-time.

"Euro-Hit" is truly fucking horrible: V/VM uses his mod-wheel as an instrument of torture that threatens to shrrrreddd yr mind as it slowly shifts in and out of tune with itself, changing pitch til it makes you feel sick, and accompanied by hiccoughing vocal laugh-samples and a nervousssshufflebeat that sounds more like a guilty wank than a rhythm-track.

"Ghent Lon" sounds like an alternative soundtrack to Brian Yutzna's "Society": wobbling sinewaves, detuned strings and muted acidsquelches mingle in amongst a multitrack'd moan-in: a monstrous church-sized orgy involving hundreds of decadent shapeshifting braineating swingers whose flesh flows like fluid, merging into an single undead coke-numb'd group-sex-mind sculpted by Screaming Mad George... Euro-polymorphic-perversity never sounded so great.

I can't wait to get pissed and play this really loud...maybe put on a leotard & legwarmers, let off fireworks and get into some serious BDSM w/ a middleaged woman that looks like Lulu.

I hope V/VM keeps making Neo-New Beat records like this forever.