Friday, June 16, 2006


Took my eldest swimming this afternoon, and Kid Kid Shirt's cousin, my nephew, set off the fire-alarm at Yeovil Swimming Pool.

(I was stood next to him when he did it, paralysed by a zombie disbelief-trance (How's that Neil Young song go: "All in a dream/All in a dream"...?). Huh, did he just, like, do that? Yep, he did...)

Boy, you should've seen the carnage that followed: flocks of screaming parents running out the building clutching their kids. (Omigod, ohmigod, the water's on fire...The water's on fire!!!!)

Of course, my responsible adult parent head was appalled and embarrassed. But my 16yr old alter-ego (still alpha-napping on a 3am milktrain back from London) was cheering him on: attaboy.

Apparently, he's now grounded (like, er, how d'ya ground an 8yr old?) and has to write a letter of apology to the Swimming-pool's management. But, fuck, I bet it was worth it. He's gonna be a hero at school on monday. Arson next, I reckon. Then some sort of stunt in 2014 in Trafalgar Square involving a Tory MP and a bag of urine, followed by recruitment to a Situationist Internationale meta-terrorist dada-cell sponsored by The Invisible College.

Presumably, I was some sort of passive-trigger whose proximity caused his subconscious to go into pre-pube melt-down. After all, Circle Brophy, Rehane and me once accidentally telekinetically triggered the fire-alarm at Camber Sands in 2004 just by grooving too much to The Magic Band.


At 8:27 pm, Blogger rocket ron said...

i was there. len fairclough and i were in shock. we thought the alarm was because of us. phew paranoia kicking in.

At 8:36 pm, Blogger doppelganger said...

phew... I have to don a yellow fluorescent tabard whenever the fire alarm goes...

At 8:54 pm, Blogger kek-w said...

Is that an obsessive-compulsive thing, or are you a fire-warden?

At 7:20 am, Blogger Molly Bloom said...

Tell your nephew he is the hero of the blogging universe. He's gonna go far.

Did anybody have to go out of the building in their arm-bands? That would have been pure spectacularrr!


Can we have a guest post from him entitled: 'My unique rebellion'

At 10:06 am, Blogger kek-w said...

I'm sure I saw an inflatable pink ring in the shape of a dragon or something :-)

At 4:07 pm, Blogger rocket ron said...

it wasnt inflatable

At 4:44 pm, Blogger kek-w said...

Jeez...I walked into that one.


Post a Comment

<< Home